Hallmark put the value into Valentine's Day commercializing it so as to create a rebellious non-following. I know more couples that refuse to celebrate Valentine's Day because they claim they do not need a reminder to be sweet to one another. They also rebel against the rising price of roses and red flowers in the days leading up to the 14th, candy and chocolates that appear in pretty heart displays in every grocery store, and advertising that says you must buy new red lingerie.
Valentine's Day began as a way to commemorate two Christian martyrs named Valentine. In the High Middle Ages poet/writers like Geoffrey Chaucer, who were into the whole courtly love thing, made romantic love cool. Do you remember the simplicity and fun in early Elementary School when once-a-week art class in the month of February revolved around hand made heard cards, white lace doilies and shoeboxes that you decorated yourself to hold all your cards?
I'm not saying that we should not celebrate love. If you find love, you have a reason to celebrate! What I dislike is the commercialization of this (and every other holiday) as well as the expectation that you must do things out of the ordinary on this day. Now, don't get me wrong, I love being given flowers or gifts or surprises (who doesn't?!), but I don't like being told "this is how you should do it: buy a Hallmark card, buy a dozen red roses, go out to a fancy restaurant, you must wear new lingerie, etc. and it should only be on this day." Why can't we do this on other days as well?
How about this idea: pick a date that is special to you and your someone. It can be an anniversary date (and this does not have to be a wedding anniversary). On that day of each month, celebrate your love for one another! Whoever does the cooking, cook your special someone's favorite meal. The one who doesn't do the cooking, do something that your special someone loves. If you choose to go out you have many options: you can dress up if you don't do that often (think celebration) or if you are more comfortable in casual clothes pick a restaurant that you don't go to every weekend - think ethnic. Basically, make one day a month yours. Claim it as your own. Invent your own traditions.
I know a charitable organization that has a great idea for this Valentine's Day: since culture says this is the month to think in hearts and the colour red, why not support a heart transplant for a Vietnamese child whose parents cannot afford to pay for the heart transplant? This would literally save a life.
Vets with a Mission is the charitable organization. Years ago a good friend of mine helped found this organization and is on the board of this non-profit movement of reconciliation. Your funds will go to the people of Vietnam, not the pockets of already wealthy Americans. Their website is:
Vets with a Mission. Cut flowers, no matter how beautifully arranged, wither and chocolate boxes get recycled, but sharing your money with another human being so that they can have life... now that is a worthy cause, something that will last longer than one day.
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About 600 km North of St John's, in the small little town of Seal Cove, a group of 4 men broke the ice so that 3 trapped dolphins could swim free. One of them, Brandon Banks, was only 16. In his floating survival suit, he got in the freezing water and let the weaker dolphin rest on him. "...they would come up and rest their head on me and I would keep their head out of the water so they can breathe through their blowhole."
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